Five Decisions That Can Fix Relationship Problems Fast

Love relationship problems are mostly experienced between spouses who believe that marriage will cover for their weaknesses, loneliness, immaturity and ideal romance dreams. On the contrary, marriage is where you continuously grow to give the best of you in order to get the best your spouse.

It takes a lot of newlyweds a few painful months to realize that relationship problems in marriage are inevitable… and that they require a constant willingness to learn and grow to keep them away.

I gave five decision-making questions in my previous post titled, Marriage requirements for total happiness Part 1. Please read it… because this post is actually a continuation of that one.

Character decisions are hard to make… I must confess… but once made… produce massive rewards of love, happiness and peace in marriage.

Marriage partners who are facing relationship crisis… can drastically reduce relationship problems to a barest minimum by committing themselves to the following all-important decisions.

Decision 1:

I will keep our Connection unbroken

The way to keep fueling the fire of love in a relationship is to make a firm decision to be regularly connected with your spouse.

Before marriage you always wanted to know where your spouse is, how he or she is fairing, whether or not he or she is OK.

But now, almost everything except your spouse gets you attention. Your job, your kids, your career, your home location, and the domestic bills- they all seem to matter more than the most important person in your life.

This eventually leads you to boredom and emotional isolation from your spouse.

The problem is simple… lack of connection with your spouse. Every successful marriage relationship requires a time of sharing and listening.

I suggest that you make a decision to connect. Take time to understand your spouse’s daily moods, needs and desires. Constant and deliberate longing for intimacy will keep you adequately bonded to with spouse. This is a worthwhile decision to make.

Decision 2:

I will make excuses for my spouse’s actions

This decision has nothing to do with encouraging infidelity or dishonesty in the home. It only means you are making a decision not to pre-judge your spouse’s actions.

Elena once accused Peter, her husband of not being caring because he didn’t attend their first son’s high school soccer game. Peter felt hurt because his wife just couldn’t foresee a genuine reason on his part.

Eventually during a counseling session, Peter revealed how his car broke down on the way to the soccer game. He recounted how hard he tried to meet up but couldn’t. ‘Maybe I should have known that’, Elena muttered.

Sometimes, you need to make excuses to keep your emotions under check until you find out why something happened. Many times, we analyze our spouse’s actions prematurely judging him or her guilty before knowing the details.

Making a decision not to be too much in a hurry to judge actions will save your marriage from troubles come with relationship problems.

Decision 3

I will trust you and be responsible

When you feel you are the only one giving to the relationship and your spouse is not, you may be tempted to slow down on your commitments because of feelings of being cheated and disappointed.

But this is not the best way to build the trust and responsibility your marriage needs to survive. It’s your love… based on high trust that should motivate your actions… not duty.

See your marriage like a team of two… playing together to win. It doesn’t matter who is scores the point… as long as the team is winning. And of course in every healthy team each player trusts the other one to do what is best for the team. A defender can take the position of the attacker and vise versa.

… It all boils down to ultimately winning the game.

Marriage works the same way. Learn to trust your spouse to do what is best for the love relationship. If you are currently carrying more of the load, reckon that your spouse would learn from you and do the same at some point in your marriage future.

This way you live with your mind free and fulfilled… and also influencing your spouse with the act of responsibility… and for the overall health of your love relationship.

Decision 4

I will be honest about myself.

You’d be amazed at how hard we strive sometimes to be who we are not. Acts of pretence, little lies, half-truths and all other defensive tactics are all forms of dishonesty… that will create a falsified perfectionist image of our true selves.

The misconception is that partners feel they will be loved more… trusted more… or even respected more if they cover up for their inadequacies. But unfortunately dishonesty in marriage doesn’t possess any real benefit. It kills an healthy relationship faster than you can imagine.

Make a decision to be true to yourself and your spouse all the time. Get comfortable with your true self… and let it show in your love relationship with your spouse.

You stand a chance of being loved more by saying an occasional “I’m sorry” than making articulate excuses that cleverly defend your actions.

Decision 5

I will be the Change that I seek.

Are you seeing your spouse as the problem in your relationship? May be you will be better off taking by taking an inward look.

Your marriage would be fair better if you understand the law of cause and effect. Every marriage problem needs your action approval to build.

The greatest weapon to change others is living by example. If your husband is not caring enough, maybe you should reassess how caring you are yourself. Maybe you should saturate him with some care until if becomes almost impossible to reciprocate.

For whatever character you expect from your spouse, make sure you are giving it in yourself. Just like life, marriage is like an echo- you always get back as much as you give.

Therefore seeking solutions for your relationship problems may sound a little bit of work but the rewards are guaranteed. Your marriage relationship must be nurtured to maturity by making the above character-building decisions.

Therefore remain committed to keeping relationship problems away from your marriage.