Handling Infidelity problems in Marriage

One of the commonest causes of after-marriage problems is infidelity. When you consider the speed at which couples drift emotionally apart after the unfaithfulness in a marriage, you will realize how serious the issue of infidelity is.

Ken and Judith swore to be faithful to each other in their highly esteemed marriage. As a matter of fact they spent a lot of time with each other before marriage. Judith felt she knew her spouse so well and long enough that she could bet her life on his faithfulness.

But a few months after marriage, a strange woman came along that her spouse couldn’t resist. The infidelity game started.

First, she began to notice strange signs. But she still couldn’t get herself to believe that her strange fears could be true… at least not after a few weeks of marriage!

Then one day, she came from work rushing to their bedroom to grab a well-deserved rest, only to find her husband in bed with someone else… on their family marriage bed!

‘No… this can’t be my husband’ she muttered to herself as she stepped backwards, rushing right into the street not knowing where to go or who to talk to.

Three months later, she still can’t fix an explanation for that terrible incident in their marriage… an incident that has drilled a sore into your heart.

May be that perfectly describes your troubled marriage… or may even be worse. Or you as a husband experienced infidelity from your wife. It’s really very hard to keep those painful memories away. But there can be healing for your broken heart.

Depending on how well you and your spouse handle this marriage problem, there are 3 major likely consequences.

• Divorce –the most painful and worst consequence

• Trial Separation- If the aggrieved spouse is uncertain about the future of the marriage

• Healing through a process of building lost trust - the best solution.

These are some steps you may consider taking to bring love back to this marriage:

Ask yourself the basic question: Is your love relationship worth considering a solution to this marriage problem?

You can answer this question by attempting to list the great qualities you have come to love in your marriage partner.

If you find out you actually adore some great qualities in your spouse, then try to talk things over with him or her. Find out how repentant your spouse is and how willing he or she is to avoid this terrible threat in the future.

In case you cannot handle this marriage amendment alone you may seek the help of a marriage counselor or your pastor (if you are a Christian).

A willingness to forgive may save your marriage, your happiness and that of your love life.

If you appear too wounded to seek a solution using the above approach, a good marriage fitness program is a very good alternative. Things may not be as bad as they appear to be at the moment.

Also, bad marriage problems can be reduced to solvable ones if you allow time and questions to open your eyes to a bigger picture. That is how a good marriage therapy will help solve infidelity problems in marriage.